Home > Forum > Ask a Guy > How do I let a guy know I am not interested?
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Etritonakin

Joined: 9/11/2008

You don't owe anyone anything (unless you actually do, of course). If you are not interested, but still want to express something.. or offer friendsip or conversation -do so. Otherwise -ignoring them is a kind way to direct them to someone who might be interested (just as not saying what you reeeeeeeaaaaallly want to say can also be kind -though considerate advice can be good).

I'm interested in everyone -but in different ways (people are awesome, even if I don't agree with them). Therefore, I initiate and/or respond/ignore accordingly.

It's sorta like music... My favorite songs have lyrics I completely agree with, rhythm that motivates me, intricacy that challenges me, and is performed by people I wouldn't mind hangning out with...
but I listen to everything for that which is excellent in it -and the rest I use to better understand people ..or tune it out as I enjoy the rest.

Posts: 321

Posted 8 years ago
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nighthowl50

Joined: 9/28/2005

yeah...isn't it strange that you are so beautiful and sexy up to the point where you say "no thanks" and then the vulgarity begins.

Posts: 4912

Posted 8 years ago
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Etritonakin

Joined: 9/11/2008

Too right! Just because you aren't compatible, doesn't mean you can't show adoration... or accept praise!
You might think me a dork... and not err in doing so (I actually aspire to dorkdom)-but neither is my high opinion of you errant!
You rock -don't deny it!
...and though I might be base in your eyes, someone whose eyes have seen how base a psyche or situation can truly be might esteem me great for overcoming.. even enduring such! I have esteemed others so.

If we exist in the same time, it does not necessarily mean we can understand each other's situation! It may have been easier in times past (and inversely, and exponentially, so) -but we cannot assume we know each other simply because we can see each other! -video -photo -print -it deceives! It is as honest as it can be -but, then, it is represented -and so misrepresented. When liars wield cutting-edge technology, omnipotence and omnipresence is little more than facade!

Bottom line... do that which decreases your exposure to such extraneous verbage!!!! (Say -or don't say -"no thanks" -and get with a real guy!)

Posts: 321

Posted 8 years ago
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fantasylife88

Joined: 11/22/2008

I have to say, what he don't know won't hurt him. Men hate rejection. I would tell him that you have a boyfriend and are in love...period and he should go away. If not and he is persistent then tell him he has an ugly face and you could not stand to look at him and I am sure the self concious nature will cause him not to call again.

Posts: 8

Posted 8 years ago
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lionsroar

Joined: 10/21/2004

Don't worry about it. If a guy or gal for that matter doesn't get the hint, that's really on them.

Posts: 5

Posted 8 years ago
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marigold

Joined: 10/25/2008

I usually do not respond if I am not interested. I don't think it's necessary to respond to every single message. What about NO RESPONSE is unclear? I think it's the kindest way to show lack of interest. I prefer that to a message that says, "you're not my type!". If someone is very pesty, I block them.

As for stringing people along. Many are on here for "online flirting". I think the safest approach is to ASSUME that people are NOT all that serious to start off with, so I just go with the flow and if it happens that there is more of a connection...fine. Otherwise...I don't take it too seriously. They are just strangers stopping by for some distraction...not a problem for me.

Posts: 6

Posted 8 years ago
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just living ma ...

Joined: 7/23/2008

let him know thats it so he does not waste hes time.



xxxx

Posts: 179

Posted 8 years ago
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wingnudtzzaa

Joined: 4/30/2008

I always like the direct approach......be nice but honest and direct. There is nothing worse then a woman who is nasty to a guy just looking to chat and get to know someone. Not every guy here is looking to "hook up"...sometimes we just want polite conversation.

Posts: 52

Posted 8 years ago
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nighthowl50

Joined: 9/28/2005

Reply to: I do the same thing. It's Webdate, it's not like these guys are meeting us in...
i had that almost exact thing happen to me not long ago. i told a very young man that i thought our age difference was too great and his reply was to
f*ck off, c*nt"

Posts: 4912

Posted 8 years ago
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pooh baer

Joined: 8/27/2008

Reply to: Not cool... Just say Thanks, but no thanks.. No matter what we should at leas...
i have a hasman

Posts: 18

Posted 8 years ago
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pooh baer

Joined: 8/27/2008

Reply to: Definitely just tell them,nothing wrong with being honest and it removes any co...
ok

Posts: 18

Posted 8 years ago
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Kajunqueen

Joined: 11/29/2008

You could reply back that you are not interested,then block them from sending any more messages.

Posts: 6567

Posted 8 years ago
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pooh baer

Joined: 8/27/2008

Reply to: LOL Nice view of things Bizz
i want to see a pic of you

Posts: 18

Posted 8 years ago
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pooh baer

Joined: 8/27/2008

Reply to: LOL Nice view of things Bizz
i want to see a pic of you

Posts: 18

Posted 8 years ago
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pooh baer

Joined: 8/27/2008

Reply to: Definitely just tell them,nothing wrong with being honest and it removes any co...
do you want to be my frind

Posts: 18

Posted 8 years ago
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pooh baer

Joined: 8/27/2008

Reply to: i had that almost exact thing happen to me not long ago. i told a very young m...
hi

Posts: 18

Posted 8 years ago
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pooh baer

Joined: 8/27/2008

Reply to: i had that almost exact thing happen to me not long ago. i told a very young m...
hi

Posts: 18

Posted 8 years ago
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Ice_Man

Joined: 8/7/2008

I have lots of emails from guys, most whom I am not attracted to. This is a question for the guys, if you were to email me and I did not find you attractive in anyway and didnt wish to make any further contact, is it best I tell you straight.. or pretend I hadnt noticed your email in the first place. I have recieved abusive mail from men if I let them know I am not interested in them. (of course I do this as gentle as possible!)

Its like dropping a glass vase on concrete, you can only do it once because it breaks right...so do it and get it over with. Plus don't you like breakin shit? no but really just be honest and firm and then Block em lol.

Posts: 40

Posted 8 years ago
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BaDaBiNg07

Joined: 11/23/2008

Be straight up with them and tell them your not interested....IF they start getting crazy then block them...besides when they get all crazy like that it just shows that they have been getting rejected alot...those are the people that if you give them the time of day and then things stop that become stalkers...

Posts: 146

Posted 8 years ago
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Kajunqueen

Joined: 11/29/2008

Reply to: Be straight up with them and tell them your not interested....IF they start get...
I agree with BaDaBing........Or did I just want to say BadaBing?

BaDaBingBaDaB ingBaDaBingBadaBing........... ... ;)


Posts: 6567

Posted 8 years ago
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BaDaBiNg07

Joined: 11/23/2008

Reply to: I agree with BaDaBing........Or did I just want to say BadaBing? BaDaBingBaDaB...
lol....

Posts: 146

Posted 8 years ago
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davidlevi100

Joined: 9/3/2008

Reply to: I don't let him know...I ignore him and he eventually goes away.
I would say that the best thing to do would be to be honest and open about how you feel. Respectfully articulate how you feel so that it's made clear. Then, if the dude decides to act stupid, just ignore him. At least YOU treated HIM with resepct and tact. The good Karma will eventually come back to you.

Posts: 2

Posted 8 years ago
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mgriffin61083

Joined: 9/6/2005

Tell them you are not interested, Not what you're looking for, blah blah blah... If you just ignore them, they'll more than likely persist.

Posts: 17

Posted 8 years ago
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BomBomPal

Joined: 9/20/2010

Hello!
If you don't like them just replay and say that you're not intrested in them, and if they replay you another time or asking why, tell them straight why, but don't go to far then hhh.
personally i like to know, so if there is something i can fix i won't be rejected again.

Posts: 1

Posted 6 years ago
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